As a mom of a toddler, I live in an endless and unforgiving loop of Thomas The Tank Engine, Teletubbies (whose food habits we have discussed at length on this blog) and Curious George. The only show I truly respect for children is Arthur, and that's because his dad left the corporate world to become a caterer. However, Arthur is a little bit beyond Bartleby's grasp, but he watches because I do. His favorite morning entertainment is Curious George, which I find totally annoying except that lately, I've gotten interested in, and somewhat envious of, the lifestyle of The Man In The Yellow Hat. Let's discuss.
The thing to envy the most about The Man In The Yellow Hat is that he lives in New York City in a pre-war two bedroom with a balcony and a doorman. Is it rent-controlled or does his job at the Museum of Natural History, which he never seems to actually do, pay really, really well?
Although we are never told that this is New York City, the writers merely call it "The City", we can assume it is. Where else can you get away with a wardrobe that consists of a yellow hat, jumpsuit and tall boots day after day with no one noticing? New York Magazine should put him in the Look Book.
He also has a house in the country, perhaps the Hudson Valley, where he goes to relax from his clearly taxing life in the city with his...monkey? Did he inherit money or am I missing something about PhDs in anthropology? What kind of values are we teaching our children?
The other day, while watching at some exceptionally early hour of the morning with Bartleby, I had a flash of insight. The Man With The Yellow Hat is NOT a New Yorker. He has all the trappings, but he finally gave himself away. He said, and I quote, "It's not a party if we don't pick up small food with toothpicks."
He's clearly a Midwesterner. I don't think New Yorkers have picked up small food with toothpicks since the 1950s. This explains why he can't get a date.
If he'd had any refinement, he would have said something like this which Maris sent me from My Life In France By Julia Child, "There are only four great arts: music, painting, sculpture and ornamental pastry - architecture being perhaps the least banal derivative of the latter."
Again, what ARE we teaching our children? Poor Bartleby. Save him. Send in your appetizer recipes that DON'T require toothpicks to win a special Juicychiken blog prize. Yes, I am now resorting to cheesy contests to win your posts, you lurkers. Limited to the first three posts, I can't go broke on this, so hurry.
2 comments:
I have a couple of ideas of appetizers that DON'T require toothpicks. They are still finger foods, but they don't require cutting down a tree to hold the ingredients together.
Bruschetta - normally you'd serve this favorite Italian app with the toppings on the bread, but at a party, you're just asking for trouble. What I do is create a bruschetta mix in a bowl and then have my toasted Italian bread line around the bowl. Guests can add as much or as little as they like. Don't limit yourself to the traditional tomato/olive oil/basil topping. Branch out, try an olive tapenade for a spread with orange peel shavings or a roasted red pepper and roasted sweet onion with some olive oil and a hint of basalmic vinegar.
Create a little bit of chicken salad (either creamy or vinegary) and put a dollop on a raw Belgian endive leaf (Belgian endive is sometimes called witloof). Take a larger endive, trim off the bottom and in that nice shell put a scant tablespoon of chicken salad. It's important that your chicken salad isn't too runny, of course.
Finally, for the meat-eater in your life, put White Castle (a shout-out to my Midwesterners) to shame and make your own sliders. This is very easy to do by going to the deli and buying the little cocktail bread loaves (or taking the Pepperidge Farm breads and cutting in fourths - the object is thinness for the bread) and creating little hamburgers for your guests. You can season the ground beef (or whatever meat - or soy-based crumbles) to your liking, then put out a condiment bar for your guests. Trust me, they'll be a hit.
As usual, we can count on Hildy for great ideas. Where is your blog Hildy? I think I will just give up. Ah, but we have a clue to Hildy's real identity - she shouts out to Midwesterners, she knows what a slider is, which means she has at least been this way...perhaps in her past life...perhaps during her undergraduate work in the History of Food?
I have noticed the appearance of the slider on a number of menus, both high-end and low end. I say slather a little pate on top of the slider appetizer and watch your guests flip out.
As for the contest, I am going to allow another week for the lurkers to get it together and post something.
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